Raina passed away last Friday unexpectedly. The intensity of the treatment too much for a small body to manage. We will miss her terribly. She was buried today at Congressional Cemetery in the District of Columbia... sent off with a ceremony attended by her closest family.
There is a great quote in a book that my sister-in-law bought us about grief. Paraphrased it is "The only way out of grief is through" ... implication being that healing can only be purchased through the experience of pain for a loss. I suppose I wouldn't have it any other way. Raina was truly the great joy of our lives. For us to be anything less than totally despondent now would imply she was something less than everything to us.
May you rest in peace, little Raina. We love you. May we find comfort in our faith that you are light and love and healed now, watching over your Mom and Dad with every kiss of sunshine and hug from a loved one.
ReplyDeletefrom my favourite children's book - "there are gentle winds blowing, and stars all around you..."
ReplyDeleteFind strength in those around you, and those sending support and love from afar. We will help carry your sorrow in these days, weeks and months ahead.
A friend of mine recently lost his father. Despite the fact that losing a parent is more the course of nature than losing a child, his words to me in a recent letter seem appropriate to anyone who has lost their everything.
ReplyDelete"In the months since I lost my dad I've learned:
- I've never experienced pain like this. It's like a jagged knife is lodged in the heart and it hurts every time I move. The world impatiently expects you to get over it and move on and so you find ways to make it look like you are...but you know deep down you're hardly functioning, barely treading water.
- Nothing feels the same. If the laws of gravity changed, it wouldn't surprise you.
- Yet there are still moments when I have a sense that dad is nearby. I wish I could see his expressions and hear his laugh again but I know I will someday. Love doesn't end with death."
I am so sorry for your loss! Celebrate her life as you are planning to do! Cherish those memories..they willbe with you forever. May God comfort you and your family through this difficult ordeal.
ReplyDeleteJulie (Woloszyk) Patterson
(I am your mom's first cousin)
You are all on my mind constantly. I wish I could relieve your pain but there is no way. Raina was a blessing & she will be thought of & loved forever. I am so sorry for your loss & this unendurable pain. Thinking of you, Jaime
ReplyDeleteJason, Your blog is a beautiful depiction of Raina's journey. Your words are so eloquent and loving. Even perfect strangers could feel the emotion, love, dedication and strength your family exudes. No one can truly understand the pain you are feeling but I can tell you so many are aching right now and want to be there to help you through this tragic loss.
ReplyDeleteRaina will ALWAYS be in our hearts, memories, thoughts, actions, emotions. She changed the world as we know it. She is one of God's great blessings.
Please know that you are not alone. Thank you for opening up your hearts and sharing Raina with all of us. We love you guys!
Danielle and Kevin
I wish I could say something that would make you feel better, but it’s foolish to think there is anything adequate. I am so sorry for your loss & can’t imagine the hell you’re going through. Thank you for being brave enough to share Raina & her story with all of us. She was a beautiful little girl. My thoughts & prayers are with your family.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to hear that little Raina is gone. May God bless you and keep you and give you peace.
ReplyDeleteJason, is the book you have called "Life after Loss"? (by Bob Deits) ...If not, I recommend the book. It has the same message as the quote you posted and in the days where you need some words from someone who can guide you in this new life you are faced with, it can provide a small fraction of hope that you need to keep pushing through. xoxo Katherine
ReplyDeletecourtney & jason,
ReplyDeletei was so, so sad to hear about raina's passing. in my recent experience with death, i realized there are no words made that empty feeling go away, but it was comforting to know how much love and support we have. days do get a little easier, but it takes a long time, and it hurts a lot. i hate that you have to go through this. it is just so, so unfair.
raina was a tough little fighter; she must have gotten that from her two selfless, do-whatever-necessary, absolutely loving parents. my heart breaks for your family, and i hope that in the coming days, weeks, months, you find comfort in her memory and all of the laughs you shared.
this blog (and her picture blog) have been so wonderful, i am so grateful to you both for having the courage to write, even in your most difficult times. i hope it has helped you through this in some way. thank you for sharing your little sweetie with us all. i will always think of her in starbucks... and lick a little chai foam in her memory :)
big hugs and lots of love, from your cousin amanda (and chad and grayson)
Courtney and Jason, Raina's life was filled by your love and warmth. It was a beautiful to watch the great "team" the three of you were. Raina's strength was in your love. Keep her love for you in your hearts forever--it is her gift to you. Love you, Aunt Kathy
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